masochist

i have let you
seduce
  me
reduce
  me
to a shell of a girl

love me harder
make me numb to
 the pain
inflicted with every touch of your hand

there is nothing left of
 me
but your handprints on my back and your lips on my neck
traces of encounters that have come to define me
to rob me of my sense of self
slowly melting into how you want me,
when you want me

this is not love but
masochism --
aching for your affection that
becomes my pain